that March, April, May and June and over. Where does the time go?
SO much has happened in the last few months, I had a hard time getting motivated to update my journal. I would like to keep going, as I feel I invested so much time already, but between being on Facebook now (I bit the bulet), going back to work, having a toddler RUNNING around....I feel overwhelmed most days!

The first thing I want to do is post Owen's birth story....my little baby turned a year old on May 11!!  I have to write more about all the "fun times" in the last few months, but I want to start with this:
 

Owen Joseph

May 11, 2010

8 lbs 14 oz

I went in on Monday to be induced. I wasn’t exactly happy with the thought of being induced, but at the same time, I was ready for the pregnancy to be over with. I was very uncomfortable---had awful heartburn and was just miserable the last few days.

I was hoping I would have gone into labour on my own over the weekend (even eating chicken wings and pineapple) but showed no signs of labour starting.

I didn’t sleep at all Sunday night. I woke around 1:45am and didn’t go back to sleep until around 6:45am when I dozed off for ½ hour. When I woke at 7:15, I needed to call L&D to make sure there was room for me to come in, so I called and they told me to be there before 8. I had a bit of a panicky feeling bc I was rushed (I didn’t think I’d have to be there so early!) and because I was really going in THAT DAY! The kids were at my parents, so we didn’t have to worry about getting them out the door, and luckily we managed to get out of the house at be at the hospital for 8.

As soon as I got to L&D, they had me change into a gown and put me on the monitor. We have one last picture of me, lying in the bed with my big baby belly…waiting. The Obstetrician came in around 9, checked me and decided they would start me on “the gel”. I wasn’t dilated at all, which was rather disappointing, but I knew it would happen eventually. They gave me the gel and I was told to walk, walk, walk. For the first couple of hours, I didn’t really feel anything other than cramps. At 3 pm, my family doctor, who was going to be delivering O came in and gave me another dose of the gel. At this point, he reassured me that this time it would work and I’d have a baby that night!! HA! He had no idea O was not ready to come out!

After the second dose, we walked some more, this time I was in pain….lots of pain. I couldn’t tell if it was contraction pain or cramp pain, but it was pain that was coming and going, so I was hopeful it was the start of something. By suppertime I was tired and sore and still running on no sleep from the night before. The nurse told me to have a shower and see how things were afterwards. I was checked again at some point and was 1cm dilated…so I knew things were moving slow. The shower was great (and it gave Steve a bit of time to rest). It didn’t trigger anything, but it relaxed me so much.

Later into the evening, we made the decision to stay the night and not attempt to go home, in case things happened quick. I was moved to another room, this one with a cot for Steve and a TV. I settled there for the night, still having lots of pain and contractions that were showing up on the monitor, but not making me progress any. I asked for something for the pain at around midnight, but then decided against it and did end up falling asleep and had a decent sleep at that. Steve stayed the night on the cot next to me.

At 6:30am Tuesday morning, my family doctor came in to check me (still 1 cm) and ordered I start the Pitocin drip. They started this right around 6:30, much to my surprise. I was anticipating another round of gel and a long day of waiting again. About an hour after I started the drip, I started to feel painful, consistent contractions. I began to ask for an epidural EARLY because I really wanted one. I knew this was my last delivery and wanted to “enjoy” it as much as possible. It annoyed me that the nurses kept telling me, “oh, you’ll get it after”…and I should have known then that it wasn’t happening!

At around 8:30, the Obstetrician came in and broke my water. That’s when it really hit me that things were going to move quickly. I called home and had spoke to the kids before they went to school, and told my mom to come up as soon as she could. When he broke my water, I was in even more pain with the first contraction. I feel a different kind of “grinding” pain and felt that Owen had dropped down even more. When I got into that hospital bed, just a mere 2 hours before, I had no idea that I wouldn’t be up again until after I delivered.

Mom got there around 9:30, at which point I was still asking for an epidural, but because I was only 2 cm dilated, they wanted me to wait. I was insisting that once I started to dilate, I would go quickly (but what do I know??). About ½ hr later, it was unbearable and I knew I was almost ready to push. The nurse checked me and I was 6-7 cm dilated (from 2 half an hour ago!). Again, I begged for the epidural with no avail, I was moving too quick. As soon as she checked me, she asked if I was feeling pressure. I told her no, I wasn’t, and literally, seconds later, with the next contraction, I had to push. They had called Dr. Murphy sometime around 10, after they found I was 6-7. I was worried he wasn’t going to make it. I started to push with my next contraction, and even though I thought I was still 6-7, they checked me and within those few minutes, I was fully dilated.

Dr. Murphy arrived about 10:30, as I was pushing, scrubbed up and caught Owen at 10:55am! I pushed through about 4-5 contractions and he was born!

When he came out, he didn’t cry…it took a long time and it was very worrisome. I looked over at him and saw the oxygen mask on his face and waited…I remember I kept asking over and over if he was OK, and they kept telling me “he’ll cry soon”. It seemed like the longest few minutes ever, but eventually he cried, the most beautiful little cry ever.

They wrapped him up and when I saw him, I couldn’t believe how beautiful he was. He had perfect pink skin and the smallest, little scrunched up face. He was absolutely perfect.

We stayed in the L&D room until I was cleaned up (they even made me have a shower about an hour after I delivered—which totally surprised me, but made me feel SO much better). We then moved down to the nursery unit (thank god I had a private room) and stayed there until we were discharged on Thursday. It was quite the amazing few days! I am so thankful that everything went well and we’re home and happy and enjoying this beautiful baby boy!

One year later.....

Mom and Dad just left for Antarctica. They will be gone until February. I'm so glad they are healthy and well and able to travel, but I miss them when they are gone!! Dad has taken a liking to my new iPod, and has used Charles' to call me on it 3 (maybe 4) times yesterday....which is funny bc Dad is NOT into technology at all. I think my mother is going to get one when she gets home. Now that is even more funny!!!

So all in all, everything is well and everyone is good. I may also make a New Year's resolution to post more. For myself that is, so I don't forget the little things...and there are many.

 

But in my defence I typed out a loooong post a few weeks ago and it got deleted.

For my own records (and since I don't have a baby book yet for Owen), Owen is just over 6 months old. He started solids right around 6 months and they are hit or miss. Sometimes he takes them, sometimes he doesn't. He still will NOT take a bottle, but is taking a sippy cup pretty good, so we'll probably skip the bottle all together. We tried formula at 6 months, ONE TIME, and he wanted nothing to do with it---spit it out, choked, gagged and it didn't go over well. This stresses me out a bit, but we're dealing. Sleep is still an issue, but it's gotten much better during the day (will take one "longer" nap an hour or so) which is good. Nights are still up and down all night....oh well, at least he's here and healthy!!
Owen can say DaDa and recognizes him and associates the name and face. He also says "quack quack" which was his offical second word. Crazy, I know. It started by him playing with the duck in the tub and went from there. He even answers now when we say "what does a duck say?". It's pretty hard to believe, but true. Still no Mama yet. Oh, and one bottom tooth popped through this weekend (6 months, 3 weeks) and the other is about to come out too.
 

We're appoaching a busy month. My sweet, sweet Calum turned 8 last week. Where does the time go?? I remember the morning I had him--we lived in Antigonish and I was scheduled to be induced. It was very snowy and cold out. Steven had the car ready to go and we got to the hospital bright and early. My induction went smoothly and I spent most of my time in the hot shower. When the pain started, everything went quick and I almost didn't make it from the shower--to the rocking chair---to the bed and he was born (just after 4 pm). He was cute and cuddly right off the bat. I love my boy!!!!

AInsley's birthday is coming up also, she is turning 6, I can't beleive it!!!

Lots of excitment this month, I can't wait for Christmas and for Santa to find the kids....it's such an exciting time!

 

Guess what I can do now that I'm 5 months old!!!
 

I'm also trying to eat everything in sight, including things that are NOT food!! I weigh about 17 lbs 6 oz and I can roll over, one way. I'm starting to like my exersaucer more and more. Mommy put the swing away (I never really liked it anyway) and put the playpen away too (she just used it to change my bum). I have a new toy organizer with lots of new toys to play with, now that I can grab them and chew on them. I'm in size 3 diapers and size 9-12 month clothes. Mommy's very, very sad that time is going so quickly, but very happy to see me growing so well. I still won't take a paci and am not too fond of bottles. Mommy is in trouble if she doesn't wean me before she goes back to work!!

I've had a much better few days.

I have a game plan for Owen's sleep issues and had a good chat with my Doctor about Ainsley and just knowing I have support with her and FOR her, I feel at ease.

I tried to let Owen cry-it-out on Friday night and couldn't do it. He cried for 20 mins when I put him down and fell asleep, so I thought it would be easy, LOL. Then he woke an hour later and cried for 40 mins, at which point I went to pick him up and snuggle him. I just couldn't do it. He still still up off and on all night, but I didn't feel guilty.
Today, I'm in the process of letting him CIO for naps. I will start with naps bc the daytime is much more managable than night, and hopefully if he can start going to sleep on him own in the day, it will transfer to the nights. *HOPEFULLY*.

Ainsley is on a bit of a reward system---home and school, which seems to be working very well. We are having her privately tested in, hopefully, the near furture to have her IQ and an array of tests done. She is a genuis...I think that part of her problem is her mind is racing. She is always asking questions, trying to figure things out and wants to know more. We talked about her being gifted, and since our family doctor has been seeing her regularly since birth, he agrees that there is *something* there--but something good of course. We always said that with her--she talked early (extremely early) walked early, has an expansive vocabulary, excellent reasoning and problem solving skills, has an advanced sense of humor (cracks adult jokes ALL the time), relates well with adults, has an incredible memory ( I can't even begin to describe the things she remembers) and IS IN CONSTANT MOTION!! All signs of a gifted child.

 I'm hoping that if her IQ shows to be above normal, her school program will be adjusted somehow, and her behavior problems will settle down. It's a cycle...

Sooooo...realizing that I need to adjust, adapt, whatever...makes me feel like I at least have some direction.

Steve and I got away (with Owen) for three days last week. I am so very lucky that my parents just 'move in' when we need them (or want them) too. We went to Haifax and got all of our shopping done. We needed the break from the kids and just some time together, to talk, to laugh and to enjoy each other--and Owen, after what seemed like a hard few weeks for us. We're very pleased with our gift selections this year. We chose less, which I'm very excited about and took a lot of time to think about meaningful things for each child, not just buying for the sake of buying.  Their big gift from us is going to be fabulous and I can't wait to share with everyone!! It's a secret unitl then...lol!

My parents are coming for supper tonight, they are leaving for New Zealand & Austraila on Wednesday!! They are very excited. They're going to be gone a month--we'll miss them. We're hoping to spend some time at their place while they are away and get out of the city.

Can't believe Halloween is around the corner! Mom made Christine a beautiful costume; she is going to be a Roman Goddess...man, gone are the days when dressing up as a pumpkin was cute!!

Kids have started school again and hte house is quiet. I'm sad summer is over and do miss them during the day. The only good thing about September is getting back on a schedule...well, at least 5 of us...Owen makes his own schedule!!

We had a grea trip to Moncton just before school started and spent a few days with friends of ours and their lovely little ones. It was a great way to end the summer.

I will post more frequenlty for my own sake...I want to remember these days when this time next year I'll be back in the classroom...yuck. I'll enjoy it while I can.

12 weeks ago, my sweet baby boy was born!

It amazes me everyday that I still, after 4 children, LOVE every minute of everyday with Owen. I love when he wakes up in the night and snuggles into me, when he holds my finger while he nurses, when he stretches and smiles at me every morning when he wakes up. I love every minute.
People always say "oh, he's your fourth" like he's not as special as our first, but that's so not the case. We love each of them with all of our hearts :)

In some ways, the fact that he's our fourth bodes well for the fact that we are much more relaxed and laid back. For example, we went to a soccer game last night, forgot the diaper bag at home, kept driving and stayed for the whole game with nothing but baby---no blanket, diapers, wipes, change of clothes...all the things you would typically bring if you were away from the house for more than 1/2 hour. But, we managed. Also, I've learned not to change my clothes every time he spits up on me...and instead wait until the end of the day to put my top in the laundry! I also take advantage of the strength and agility of my 7 year old and ask Calum to fetch Owen on a regular basis for me. This, I would have never done with my first, or my second for that matter. I've also learned that store brand diapers are just as good as the expensive ones, poop stains don't necessarily "ruin" an outfit and dirty little finger really DO pacify a baby...

I am so grateful for everything I have. I truly feel like I have a great life, with a great family and great friends. I know I say this a lot, but I can't help spending a lot of time thinking of all the different situations our family could be in---and I couldn't pick a better one. We are happy, healthy and content. Such a good way to be.

Louisbourg camp was great; the kids did well and had fun. Such a great experience. I actually think Ainsley enjoyed it the most, which surprises me since I was on the fence about putting her in, but she adapts so well in any situation, so I really shouldn't have been that surprised. She came home with a list of phone numbers from her new "best friends".

I did some cleaning today--the kids bedrooms and man, did they ever need to be gutted. Christine is such a pack rat, it took three solid hours of going through her room. Two green garbage bags and one blue bag later, we were done!

I made a super easy chocolate bark tonight and it was soooo good, but am super pissed bc the wax paper used to line the cookie sheet it was on, stuck to the bottom of all the bark....I knew I should have trusted my instincts and used parchment paper...why do people not know about this miracle baking paper?? Next time...

Thinking of going away for the night on the weekend with our neighbors. We'll wait and see what the weather is like and decide if it's worth it or not! It takes a lot of convincing (and effort) to pack everyone up for a weekend!!

One minute she's playing in the backyard, the next she looks like this..........

 

All dressed up for the dance :)

Wow, a whole month. I could cry it's gone by so fast.

The last few days have been nothing short of pandemonium--Steve is away and I am home alone with 4 kids!!! Wednesday night was awful--Owen was up every single hour...all night long. And, on top of that, Ainsley was up twice with a bad dream. I don't think I slept at all Wednesday night. Then Thursday, I miraculousy got the kids on the bus and off to school and Owen was fussy and cranky ALL day. He's had quite a few fussy days, and I'm thinking it must be something I'm eating, but can't figure it out. I think vegtables in general is one culprit, which really sucks because I eat a lot of veggies.

Christine has a semi-formal dance tonight. It's her first real school dance. I'm nervous and excited for her. I have to straighten her crazy hair for her, I'm not looking forward to that!! She had a dress and all the accessories! She's very excited.

Ainsley has been on that many play dates in the last few weeks, it's hilarious!! She's gone to the circus, out for supper, over friends' houses, she is SUCH a social butterfly.

Calum is keeping busy too---can't wait to see Karate Kid :)

Steven's parents came over last night, to my surprise. It's the first time Steven's father saw the baby--yes, they live  three blocks away, and the second time his mother's seen him (once in the hospital). Crazy, I just don't understand how people don't value their family like we do. I couldn't imagine seeing my grandkids two or three times a year, regardless of where we lived.

The kids got to Louisbourg tomorrow for training for the program that they will be in again this summer. It's supposed to be hot and sunny, so it'll be a great day. I'm hoping Owen is having a good day so he'll hang out in the stroller or Bjorn and we can spend the day there too.

This month has been so busy with appointments and visitors, etc, I wish I blogged more for my own records...it was such a blur.

Yay to me for breastfeeding for one month today!! My first goal is 6 weeks exclusively and I have 11 days to get there...so far so good :)

Just because he's too cute not to share:


 

Owen slept through the night last night---like slept from 12 midnight until 6:30 this morning. Crazy. He woke up starving and ate so much he spit up twice afterwards! If I was conscience and awake at any point in the night, I would have gotten up to pump, but when he sleeps, I am out cold! The night before he had a 5 hour stretch too...how does that happen?? I may be jinxing myself and he may never sleep like that again, but it was awfully nice to have a couple great sleeps in a row!

And...he smiles. I swear he looks into our eyes and smiles. I've captured it a few times on camera and it is so sweet. I know the books say they aren't true smiles, but I know they are.

I have such bittersweet memories of the other kids at this age. When I had Christine, I rushed right back to school so I could graduate (with honors :)) and had so much support with her and always had people around me, literally, that helped me with her the first 18 months. I really didn't have this down time after I had her. I guess I had a different mind set then---but loved her dearly as well!! With Calum, I went right back to school to graduate (B. Ed) and had SO much school work to do it was crazy. I would spend half the nights after I had him writing papers and preparing lesson pland.  Steven looked after him a lot as a newborn and I feel like I missed out somewhat on the first few months with him as well. Then, along came Ainsley....when she came home, Calum was 24 months old, and instead of enjoying having two little ones, I was nothing but stressed out!! All I did was change diapers and pray that they would both nap at the same time so I could sleep!!!

I wouldn't change the way things have worked out in the past, because, it's just that---things worked out. That's what worked for us and we did what we could at the time. I love my children more than anything and while I feel as though I am enjoying this time with Owen more than I ever have, I also know that this is the last time I'll ever snuggle my newborn in my arms and actually have a real Maternity Leave!! Older and wiser?? Maybe, or maybe just more grateful than I ever have been. I am so blessed to have this life and wouldn't trade it for the world.

I want the days to slow down....I am savoring every single minute I spend with him and I could easily do this forever. The only thing that would make it better is if the kids were home on summer vacation! Soon enough!

 

Wow, Owen is two weeks old today. It's really, really hard to believe two weeks have gone by.

Today is a good day. O had his fourth Mother-Baby visit today and we were so relieved that he has FINALLY started to gain weight and his jaundice levels are down. It took two weeks for things to finally work themselves out. He is still only 8 lbs 6.9 oz, so a tiny little peanut, but he is growing, and that makes Mommy happy!

His weight was a concern and required three follow up visits to the hospital and a couple of trips to the doctor. I never had this problem with the other children bc I always supplemented with formula right from the beginning, but this time, I'm exclusively breastfeeding and it's like night and day.

He nurses all the time!! But, his stretches are getting longer (6 hours last night and 4 hours today!!!!). In the last couple of days, he is also so alert already. I swear, he looks right into our eyes when we talk to him. He is also starting to make faces, it's so cute.

We've also been out and about this week, I did some visiting with him, went to the mall, out for lunch (as well as the numerous appts we've been to!). I thought I'd never want to leave the house, but I've been enjoying going places during the day and trying not to care that I've already nursed Owen just about everywhere I've gone!

I'm wearing my pre-pregnancy pants and am thrilled that they fit!! It was so nice to go out today and not feel like a frumpy mess! Woohoo!

Owen Joseph

May 11, 2010

8 lbs 14 oz

I went in on Monday to be induced. I wasn’t exactly happy with the thought of being induced, but at the same time, I was ready for the pregnancy to be over with. I was very uncomfortable---had awful heartburn and was just miserable the last few days.

I was hoping I would have gone into labour on my own over the weekend (even eating chicken wings and pineapple) but showed no signs of labour starting.

I didn’t sleep at all Sunday night. I woke around 1:45am and didn’t go back to sleep until around 6:45am when I dozed off for ½ hour. When I woke at 7:15, I needed to call L&D to make sure there was room for me to come in, so I called and they told me to be there before 8. I had a bit of a panicky feeling bc I was rushed (I didn’t think I’d have to be there so early!) and because I was really going in THAT DAY! The kids were at my parents, so we didn’t have to worry about getting them out the door, and luckily we managed to get out of the house at be at the hospital for 8.

As soon as I got to L&D, they had me change into a gown and put me on the monitor. We have one last picture of me, lying in the bed with my big baby belly…waiting. The Obstetrician came in around 9, checked me and decided they would start me on “the gel”. I wasn’t dilated at all, which was rather disappointing, but I knew it would happen eventually. They gave me the gel and I was told to walk, walk, walk. For the first couple of hours, I didn’t really feel anything other than cramps. At 3 pm, my family doctor, who was going to be delivering O came in and gave me another dose of the gel. At this point, he reassured me that this time it would work and I’d have a baby that night!! HA! He had no idea O was not ready to come out!

After the second dose, we walked some more, this time I was in pain….lots of pain. I couldn’t tell if it was contraction pain or cramp pain, but it was pain that was coming and going, so I was hopeful it was the start of something. By suppertime I was tired and sore and still running on no sleep from the night before. The nurse told me to have a shower and see how things were afterwards. I was checked again at some point and was 1cm dilated…so I knew things were moving slow. The shower was great (and it gave Steve a bit of time to rest). It didn’t trigger anything, but it relaxed me so much.

Later into the evening, we made the decision to stay the night and not attempt to go home, in case things happened quick. I was moved to another room, this one with a cot for Steve and a TV. I settled there for the night, still having lots of pain and contractions that were showing up on the monitor, but not making me progress any. I asked for something for the pain at around midnight, but then decided against it and did end up falling asleep and had a decent sleep at that. Steve stayed the night on the cot next to me.

At 6:30am Tuesday morning, my family doctor came in to check me (still 1 cm) and ordered I start the Pitocin drip. They started this right around 6:30, much to my surprise. I was anticipating another round of gel and a long day of waiting again. About an hour after I started the drip, I started to feel painful, consistent contractions. I began to ask for an epidural EARLY because I really wanted one. I knew this was my last delivery and wanted to “enjoy” it as much as possible. It annoyed me that the nurses kept telling me, “oh, you’ll get it after”…and I should have known then that it wasn’t happening!

At around 8:30, the Obstetrician came in and broke my water. That’s when it really hit me that things were going to move quickly. I called home and had spoke to the kids before they went to school, and told my mom to come up as soon as she could. When he broke my water, I was in even more pain with the first contraction. I feel a different kind of “grinding” pain and felt that Owen had dropped down even more. When I got into that hospital bed, just a mere 2 hours before, I had no idea that I wouldn’t be up again until after I delivered.

Mom got there around 9:30, at which point I was still asking for an epidural, but because I was only 2 cm dilated, they wanted me to wait. I was insisting that once I started to dilate, I would go quickly (but what do I know??). About ½ hr later, it was unbearable and I knew I was almost ready to push. The nurse checked me and I was 6-7 cm dilated (from 2 half an hour ago!). Again, I begged for the epidural with no avail, I was moving too quick. As soon as she checked me, she asked if I was feeling pressure. I told her no, I wasn’t, and literally, seconds later, with the next contraction, I had to push. They had called Dr. Murphy sometime around 10, after they found I was 6-7. I was worried he wasn’t going to make it. I started to push with my next contraction, and even though I thought I was still 6-7, they checked me and within those few minutes, I was fully dilated.

Dr. Murphy arrived about 10:30, as I was pushing, scrubbed up and caught Owen at 10:55am! I pushed through about 4-5 contractions and he was born!

When he came out, he didn’t cry…it took a long time and it was very worrisome. I looked over at him and saw the oxygen mask on his face and waited…I remember I kept asking over and over if he was OK, and they kept telling me “he’ll cry soon”. It seemed like the longest few minutes ever, but eventually he cried, the most beautiful little cry ever.

They wrapped him up and when I saw him, I couldn’t believe how beautiful he was. He had perfect pink skin and the smallest, little scrunched up face. He was absolutely perfect.

We stayed in the L&D room until I was cleaned up (they even made me have a shower about an hour after I delivered—which totally surprised me, but made me feel SO much better). We then moved down to the nursery unit (thank god I had a private room) and stayed there until we were discharged on Thursday. It was quite the amazing few days! I am so thankful that everything went well and we’re home and happy and enjoying this beautiful baby boy!